Are you leading your life or being led ?

Are you leading your life or being led ? If you’re not sure of the answer let’s see what really “leading” or “being led” means. Just like let's say a painter is given a 3 X 3 feet of canvas and some water colors and a brush to paint. As to what he paints, how he paints, what color combinations he uses - he has complete freedom.

Now there are two aspects here. If he refuses to paint or does not bring out his painting potential to the hilt because he does not like the brush or thinks the canvas is too small or he does not like water colors and would have preferred some superior type of paint … … … well, he is trying to change what he cannot. This is choosing not to see the reality of the situation. As long as he does not bring his potential to the peak with what he already has, but first waits for what he doesn’t have and decides to paint only after he gets what he wants – well, he has missed his mark. This leads to a wide range of choices which seem more attractive quick fixes, bolstering the ego. The ego thrives on sympathy. He becomes a sitting duck to be led by events, forces, people and circumstances because there is no conscious decision to first use whatever is given and tap one’s potential to the highest level possible even with the seeming inadequacies. Desiring and acquiring without deserving first, stifles inner growth. It’s also an under-estimation of the value of what is already given.

On the other hand if he accepts what he cannot change (takes time, courage and a high self esteem to do this) and does his best with the given equipment, functional responsibilities of life are taken care of, thereby bringing his potential to the hilt with what he already has, thereby fully preparing himself to deserve what he desires next. This is leading your life. There’s a certain inner power that comes from accepting what you cannot change. In the very acceptance is a U (inner) -turn which is absolutely essential to move on to higher realms of life. In the very acceptance of what I cannot change is the courage to face a slammed door with a bleeding heart without knowing that another door from behind has opened silently. The moving inward temporarily might seem like a defeat but, it is growth of a profound nature. You cannot solve every problem in life. What cannot be solved needs to be transcended. That is, rising above the problem. Just like if you want to shoot an arrow very far, the bow string has to be pulled in the opposite direction as deep as possible. This needs a vision. An ability to see beyond the problem. This creates a distance between me and the problem. I stop identifying myself with the problem. I simply respond with what needs to be done and leave the result alone. This is objectivity. One of the gateways to liberation.

Just like when you see disorder anywhere, it presupposes the knowledge of what is order. If you didn’t know order, you would never know disorder. It is possible to be an excellent organizer of keeping your home and garden in order and even attain professional excellence but still be stressful, insecure and even miserable. That’s because of gross neglect of the inner self.

Personal leadership leads to intelligent living. In intelligent living there are no choices. Which means if you wish to lead your life there’s only one way. If one looks at life like a complex maze, the one way to freedom out of this maze is intelligent living. . How do I know this way ? Every moment or event in our lives be it good, not so good especially a setback, leaves behind a mark, a clue, a stamp. Salvaging this clue from the ruins of a failure becomes the fuel for growth to the next step in life. This is leading your life toward intelligent living. This clue which becomes a beacon of light in the moment of darkness is something one generally misses because one thinks one knows one’s self and one’s life very well which is the fundamental error in one’s perception.

Intelligent living, while taking care of one’s functional responsibilities precludes an acknowledgement of some power or force that’s operating the hidden variables of life when things do not go the way you planned. Refusal to accept and get into sync with the new situation arising out of your failed plan, arises from ignorance of the hidden variables operating in life. This leads to stagnation of growth and what’s worse is that you could be led by people who’re more ignorant about life than you.

If you want to lead your life you need to dare to say “I don’t know who I am but I’m willing to learn” and start harnessing your mind consciously all the time, because the eyes see what the mind thinks.

--Rekha